I grew up like many of you out there reading these words on a flickering screen while avoiding the most important thing you need to do. Put down the phone, tablet, laptop, phablet and go take care of something for yourself right now, trust me I can wait.
There wasn’t that better. I know you feel guilty about taking care of yourself. I give you permission, but I shouldn’t have to, give yourself permission. It’s okay, you work hard enough for a break, even if you don’t think you do, the fact that you have woke up this day means you got here somehow, sacrificed something to be here with me. Leave your guilt in the other room, we don’t need it here right now. You can always wrap yourself in it when you are done. My guilt peeks around the corner all the time waiting to leap out and go around my neck and try to strangle the fun out of life.
So like I said I grew up like most of you, my parents wanted a better life for me, but did not ask me what I wanted out of life. I’m 46, I’m still figuring that out. My folks let me know what they sacrificed, how they worked overtime, did without meals or frills so I could have what I needed. What I needed was a carefree childhood, but I’m not angry at my parents for that, trust me there are numerous issues and reasons why we never name those foul beasts who should never have been born.
Today I went to my therapist, chiropractor and massage therapist. Today was Tim day, yes I felt guilty, yes I slept in till 730, yes I took a 45-minute nap. I also took care of twin 4-year-olds, I spelled my wife for hours, I got my girls some donuts for tomorrow and puzzles that will be delivered Monday. I’m not going to leave them an inheritance. I’m making sure they have a good childhood, they have things that bring them happiness and things they need, letting them know that Papa is human, has pain, is imperfect and loves them more than life. If that is not enough, then I will help them find what is missing. I have stuff I do like podcasting that makes me happy, playing video games, reading comic books, listening to good music. I want them to see me enjoy life and I want them to enjoy life as well.
I’m starting #NAPOWRIMO 1 April and I’m very excited. I’m going to work on an 8-minute presentation to 200 other podcasters in September about connecting to their audience by breaking the 4th wall of the headphones. My girls will have a treasure chest of artifacts to go through after I have passed, they will see many versions of me, and all those versions have been built up to what I am today, the person you may call a friend, former lover, anonymous fellow searcher or just some dude you accidentally stumbled upon.
Welcome, let your guilt starve a little bit, don’t give it your full attention. It will get its claws in you, it will just be a little less deep each time you put it in the corner so you can enjoy life.