Some people lost their fathers this past weekend. Their feelings are raw, untouchable.
I wished my sperm donor would be drawn and quartered with a blunted butter knife. I’ve never had a father.
I had tears of no tears, now I get misty watching Disney or Pixar flicks with my daughters. Yes I’ve been reprogrammed.
Stinging is a conscious act of hurt due to being threatened by a greater force. It is the last act of a bee as it usually causes their death. The stinging we feel over the loss of loved ones feels initially like it is tearing us apart. The loss of those whom we are glad to be rid of does not cause this feeling. For me the sting of not being chosen as a priority is a feeling my children never feel. The sting of their words when they act out their frustrations cuts deep and is the power they have over me.
One day I won’t take it personal, but when I hear the anger in their voice I hear the anger inside me and I wonder how they will feel about me in 40 years. Stay tuned.